I failed to make the chess team because of my height.
I've known Chevy Chase for so long, I actually knew him when he was funny!
TV is chewing gum for the eyes.
Screaming at children over their grades, especially to the point of the child's tears, is child abuse, pure and simple. It's not funny and it's not good parenting. It is a crushing, scarring, disastrous experience for the child. It isn't the least bit funny.
There's a constant flow of child actors. It's kind of funny to watch the new crew come through. I think, You poor little things. You're going to have to struggle for a long time.
I think if everyone would write down the funny stories from their own childhoods, the world would be a better place.
If people want to compete for leadership of a religious group, they can compete in piety. A chilling thought. Or funny.
I think Jack Nicholson in 'Chinatown' is a very funny character, but I would never call that a comedy.
As a child my family's menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it.
The first time I sang in the church choir; two hundred people changed their religion.
Losing streaks are funny. If you lose at the beginning you got off to a bad start. If you lose in the middle of the season, you're in a slump. If you lose at the end, you're choking.
Sometimes you feel like people go, 'Oh, he just does funny dances,' or 'That's cute.' It drives me a little crazy when someone does a dance number where all they do is kick to their head for five minutes, and everyone's like, 'That choreography is amazing.' It takes a lot to choreograph a number that also gets laughs in it.
There are many styles of standup, but the comedians I like are people like Dick Gregory and Richard Pryor. Because Richard Pryor told the truth. Chris Rock. I love Chris Rock. He's funny, but he's also poignant. He's not there just to make people laugh; he's there to make people wake up, too.
Christopher Columbus, as everyone knows, is honored by posterity because he was the last to discover America.
It's funny how a chubby kid can just be having fun, and people call it entertainment!
Trust is hard to come by. That's why my circle is small and tight. I'm kind of funny about making new friends.
I wasn't the class clown. I wasn't that obvious. There would be a circle of guys, and they're watching the class clown. And I'm standing in the back, and I turn to the guy next to me and I say something funny to him, and he starts to laugh. And the guy next to him says, 'What did he say?'
Justice Scalia and I served together on the D.C. Circuit. So his votes are not surprising to me. What I like about him is that he's very funny and very smart.
We didn't even think about it, you know? I used to collect laser discs, and you'd have some college professor analyzing It's a Wonderful Life or Citizen Kane, and now it is pretty funny - the idea of commentary for a silly kid's movie, you know?
I was the class clown at school, but at home, my family wasn't very funny.
