I must've got whacked on the head. He presented a totally false person for me to fall in love with.
A lot of my time, effort, and focus is spent on 'WhatsApp'. And that, to me, is more valuable and rewarding than to work on anything else.
When you’re on you’re way into work, hit up the WhatsApp, find out what people want, and bring in a real coffee for everyone. Trust me when I say they will all really appreciate it.
Let me make this clear: my impairment is such that without a wheelchair, I can't do very much for myself. I can't get out of bed. I can't get myself to the toilet. I certainly can't get myself to work.
I played a paraplegic on a show called 'Neighbours.' Just turned up on set, sat in a wheelchair. The producer came up to me one day and said, 'We have to cut around that entire scene because your leg was moving.'
I have a saying - 'You treat me good, I'll treat you better. You treat me bad, I'll treat you worse. And when in doubt, knock 'em out.'
To not have the wherewithal to give fully to a relationship bothered me.
People who don't know that I do comedy think I'm shy, kind of a dud, and I don't have the wherewithal to prove them wrong. It takes me a long time to get to know people.
Planning bores me. I like to go with the flow. Being whimsical is nice, occasionally. It keeps things fresh; there's no expectation.
I'm not going to whine or get depressed. Who's going to feel sorry for me? Nobody.
For me, for a very long time, I was in denial because when you say you're sad or you're overwhelmed, we consider it whining or complaining. People say, 'Count your blessings,' and it's like, 'Yeah, I am, but I'm still sad. Something is wrong with me.' I had to acknowledge it.
Could an android listen to the whining, requests for advancement, and entreaties for guidance and affection that pour from subordinates? Sure it could. Frankly, all that would be easier on the robot than it is on me.
There are all of these people that say, my mommy doesn't love me enough, my daddy doesn't hug me enough. There are some people that would want to coddle them somewhere. I want them to shut up and stop whining.
My mum didn't understand that education was an important thing. She couldn't do my homework with me. I was helping her read stuff. She once brought shaving soap thinking it was whipped cream.
One day, I went to buy something for my dad at the shops, and I heard a song by Nat King Cole called 'Stardust Melody.' It was like I went into a trance or something. I forgot all about my dad sending me to the shop. When I got home, I explained to him what happened. I thought I was going to get a whipping, but he understood.
Life has been a really big whirlwind, but it's been a lot of fun. I travel so much, and I'm constantly doing things that I love, but it's just me.
It's kind of remarkable, everything that's happened to me. It's been such a whirlwind, but in a good way.
You are welcome to your intellectual pastimes and books and art and newspapers; welcome, too, to your bars and your whisky that only makes me ill. Here am I in the forest, quite content.
My wife said, 'Take me in your arms and whisper something soft and sweet.' I said, 'chocolate fudge.'
I remember I was at a press conference where somebody came up to me with absolute confidence, like he knew me forever, and whispered in my ear, 'You should sing a song now. The Indian audience will enjoy it. Your songs will improve India and Pakistan's relations.' I clarified to him that I wasn't Ali Zafar.
