It must require an inordinate share of vanity and presumption after enjoying so much that is good and beautiful on earth, to ask the Lord for immortality in addition to it all.
Oysters are more beautiful than any religion . . . there's nothing in Christianity or Buddhism that quite matches the sympathetic unselfishness of an oyster.
Don't be agnostic - be something.
A gentle Quaker, hearing a strange noise in his house one night, got up and discovered a burglar busily at work. He went and got his gun, came back and stood quietly in the doorway. 'Friend,' he said, 'I would do thee no harm for the world, but thou standest where I am about to shoot.'
We Jews have a secret weapon in our struggle with the Arabs - we have no place to go.
Religion is a way of walking, not a way of talking.
Puritanism - the haunting fear that someone, somewhere may be happy.
The worst moment for the atheist is when he is really thankful, and has nobody to thank.
The mystery of the beginning of all things is insoluble by us; and I for one must be content to remain agnostic.
Religion converts despair, which destroys, into resignation, which submits.
For the wonderful thing about saints is that they were human. They lost their tempers, got angry, scolded God, were egotistical or testy or impatient in their turns, made mistakes and regretted them. Still they went on doggedly blundering toward heaven.
Audible at five miles, painful at three, and lethal at one.
With soap baptism is a good thing.
When a man is freed of religion, he has a better chance to live a normal and wholesome life.
The Church of England is the Tory party at prayer.
A Unitarian very earnestly disbelieves what everyone else believes.
While I cannot be regarded as a pillar, I must be regarded as a buttress of the church, because I support it from outside.
Atheism is rather in the lip than in the heart of Man.
There's no reason to bring religion into it. I think we ought to have as great a regard for religion as we can, so as to keep it out of as many things as possible.
If the thunder is not loud, the peasant forgets to cross himself.
