We’re more proficient than women at arm wrestling, fresco-painting, ice hockey and particle physics. We make better cabinets, sun decks and booster rockets. We know how to read a map. In the movies, most Westerns and martial arts films would be poorer without our presence. ...So let’s renew our male mission and wear our antlers high on our heads. Let’s stand up straight, aim well, and exercise our prerogative to leave the seat up. After all, we’re MEN, and we hold a proud heritage in our hands.
Maybe humans are just the pet alligators that God flushed down the toilet.
I, made in England, felt excluded, miffed, resistant to the idea of even visiting India, a position of increasing absurdity as, one by one, backpacking friends returned from the place with the standard anecdotal combo of nirvanic epiphany and toilet horror.
Bangkok is a toilet without a flush.
I really can't be bothered going to a barber. And shaving every morning, that's nightmarish. I spent my teenage years covered in tiny little bits of toilet paper.
Castro couldn't even go to the bathroom unless the Soviet Union put the nickel in the toilet.
When I was about 7 years old, I built a leprechaun trap out of a cardboard box, a biscuit tin and some toilet paper tubes.
I cleaned many a toilet.
It used to be that comic strips were the big thing, and comic books were toilet paper.
You can flush my ashes down the toilet, for all I care.
I've spiked a toilet seat before, a gallon of milk, even eggs. If you say it, I've probably spiked it before.
In Michigan, a liberal democrat raised taxes and kept their government programs at the same level. And guess what? Their economy continued into the toilet, it continued down.
Me and my sisters were so awful. One nanny, we loved, but we hacked her email and sent her boyfriend lots of weird messages, and we once actually locked her in the toilet, too.
House Republicans are flimsier than toilet paper, except toilet paper actually has use. They're so pathetic.
I can't see myself ever spending hundreds of thousands on anything that doesn't come with a toilet.
It is difficult to produce a television documentary that is both incisive and probing when every twelve minutes one is interrupted by twelve dancing rabbits singing about toilet paper.
I married a man who isn't afraid to wash a dish, scrub a toilet, or have his unibrow waxed into submission by a licensed professional.
The Pacific is the best toilet for satellites.
Endangered forests are being slaughtered for toilet paper.
I refuse to go into a fast-food outlet - to use the toilet even - in case anyone got the wrong idea and thought I was sneaking in a quick burger.
